So my awesome little brother Andrew is coming to Akron as a freshmen in the fall, and I am so excited. John and I visited him at work at Applebee’s tonight and spent some time with him and one of his other friends who is currently at Akron. Naturally, lots and lots of undergraduate University of Akron stories ensued during this conversation. For the sake of the times, I figure I should post some of my/our favorite and/or most outrageous Akron memories, in no particular order. Enjoy!!
#1) My freshman year, living in Bulger residence hall, a few of my friends and I thought it would be a great idea to put a couch in the elevator, bring in some snacks, and just chill out and ride the thing up and down. It was awesome because we basically got two reactions from students entering the elevator: “What the f---?! I’ll get the next one,” or “Oh, awesome. I’ve got some pop in my room, let me grab it and I’ll join you.”
#2) Putting on the Visions play with the Mosaic ministry was completely awesome. I don’t have many words to describe it given that this one is kind of sentimental… but I have to post it first in order for #3 to make much sense.
#3) The very first night I ever saw John was actually half a year before we technically met. It was the after-party for the Visions production. Some of the folks in Mosaic were John’s roommates, so he lived at the house where we held the party. That night his previous girlfriend Sarah had just broken up with him, so when some of us arrived for the party, it was terrible timing because he was sitting on the living room couch devastated. I actually did not remember this until he shared it with me later and I was like, “I was at that party!” and he was like, “You were?!” Hilarious.
#4) My freshman year we also decided it would be fun to play hide and seek in some of the classroom buildings on campus. The best one by far was Crouse Hall. Once you were found, you had to be tagged before it counted. I found the most amazing hiding place ever in the auditorium room. I climbed up a ladder that went to the ceiling, and at the top of the ladder was a trap door, and I pushed open the trap door and it led right out to the roof. Nobody found me.
<—Here is the roof of the building!
#5) One night after church, John and I found a Bud Light van parked in the Chapel parking lot. We thought this was hilariously ironic given that everybody in ministry at the Chapel has to sign a no-drinking contract, so naturally we had to take pictures with it and expose the scandal.
#6) One late night at Steak n’ Shake there was this homeless guy just kind of hanging out in there. My friend Emily started talking to him (after he had told her that he thought she was beautiful), so eventually we convinced him to take a picture with us. The results was, in my opinion, quite sexy.
#7) Freshmen year in Robertson Dining Hall was amazing. My friends and I would always meet at 5pm to eat dinner together in this little wing of the hall that we affectionately dubbed “The Loge.” The ceiling panels were like those styrofoamy kind, so somebody started a trend of throwing silverware at the ceiling to see how much we could get stuck in there. By the end of the year, there was quite an assortment. Amazingly, spoons stuck the best. Later, the Loge was eventually closed during dinner and nobody was allowed to sit there. Likely because of us. Shaaaame. That guy in the front is Alex. He later became famous by getting a picture of him and his friends at a UA football game painted on the side of a campus van.
#8) At Fusion Awards, John played a song with his band, and I wore a dress made entirely out of duct tape. There really isn’t anything else to say about that because the picture will speak for itself. Afterwards we went straight out to eat and I continued to wear the dress. I have never gotten that many strange looks in my entire life, even in Akron.
That same night, Adam and his twin brother Aaron wore kilts. That was also amazing.
#9) I will never, ever forget the night that I was traumatized by walking in on my freshman dorm roommate and her boyfriend having sex. Adam was there, so after I ran screaming from the room he walked in, flicked on the light, walked over to their bed and said, “I see you’re having sex, eh? And you’re naked too.” Then he walked to the door, said, “Have a nice night,” flicked the light off, and left.
#10) That one winter when we had the massive ice storm (also freshmen year), the fire alarm in my door went off at night and everyone had to file outside. When I stepped out, the ground was so icy that I promptly slipped and landed flat on my back. I laid there for a few minutes before I decided to get up. Adam and Sean came over to meet me, and we decided to make a night of it by sledding down all the staircases on campus on deflated cardboard boxes.
<—This is where it went down, literally
#11) At another Fusion Awards my senior year, Sarah wore this amazing costume, complete with afro wig, and roller blades. I LOVE THIS GIRL. We have also gone rollerblading through downtown Akron. Equally amazing.
#12) Of course, there was also me and Sarah that one time with a statue of Ronald McDonald…
#13) One of the first times I came home from college to see my family, Andrew and I stuffed ourselves with leaves instead of actually raking the back yard. It is more fun to be chubby and pregnant looking than it is to do real work.
#14) Bill’s wedding… Bill’s wedding… when James and his girlfriend wanted to stay at the cheapest motel in the DC area that they could find, and they ended up at The Royal Inn, complete with a liquor store and a porn store almost on the property, as well an endless supply of drug dealers floating in and out of the parking lot. They even had the exact same fake hunting dog painting hanging on two different walls in the room. This was so classic, Tim, Nicki, John and I stuck around a little longer just to experience the sheer joy of a place more ghetto than Akron.
(This is what you do, I guess… move the room furniture to the sidewalk outside the motel. It’s like a patio. Waaaay classy.)
#15) I must not forget the nights when Joe Tucker, Alex and I used to go running around downtown Akron and we would sing Eye of the Tiger at the top of our lungs. This proved to be somewhat difficult given that none of us knew all of the words to the song, so we would often have to improvise. Duh duh duh duh, duh duh duh, duh duh duhmmmmm….
Me and Alex at a party Joe Tucker
--Peace, y’all... Part II soon to come!!